More about being friendly

So, how do you make friends with a horse? And what is the friendly game?

Well, you make friends with a horse by playing the friendly game. The friendly game is basically a session of stroking, rubbing and scratching in different places, in such a way that the horse finds it enjoyable, and friendly.

For most horses that are well broken in, a normal brushing session is sufficient, in principle. And, this is what I have managed to get away with so far. However, during my standard brushing sessions, I have never observed the horses reactions. Or rather, I have never taken any action based on the horse's reactions.

Princess was notorious for having days when she would pace left and right along the hitching rail. I just used to work around this, sometimes saying nasty things under my breath. Now, notice that Gally and Princess had this special connection - like attracts like. It's just that with Princess you could get away with working around the problem. With Gally, not so. He doesn't pace along the hitching rail. He stands very still, but he turns and bites you as fast as lightening. This made me so uncomfortable, that I had to find a solution.

The difference between ordinary brushing, and playing the friendly game, is that you observe how the horse reacts, and adjust your touching accordingly. If the horse puts his ears back you might change your stroking into scratching, or if the horse has stood very still while you stroke a sensitive area, then you might stop.

The friendly game makes a world of difference with Gally. He basically stops biting and kicking. He also becomes more willing to work for you under saddle - this is where the friendly game has exceeded my expectations.

Personally, I find the friendly game much more interesting and satisfying than brushing. I have always brushed my horses thoroughly - much to the amusement of some. But I did find it boring. Which probably created my "just get on and ride" attitude. The friendly game is a way of interacting with your horse, that is (in some ways) just as much fun as riding. So all of a sudden, I am in no hurry to get on any more, because I am having fun on the ground! How cool is that?!

Friendly Game

Gally standing quietly and happily at the hitching rail, after enjoying lots of friendly game.  Note Tornado in the background as buddy.

Friends

I have been observing Gally when I try to catch him, when I work with him, and when I let him go back out to the paddock with his friends.

When I put him out, I try to trick him. I will put him out via a gate, where he cannot see the other horses. Or, I will put him in a paddock by himself. His instant reaction, is to search for his paddock mates, and to round them up.

From this, I have come to the conclusion, that "friendship" and "security" are really important to Gally. Which means that, when I work with him, I must ensure that we are "friends", and that he feels secure.

It's elementary really. We're all like that. I work much better for a boss who comes across as my "friend", and makes me feel secure in my role. But I must admit, that I have never really paid that much attention to these. It's mainly been about "get on and ride" for me. Rather than, "hi, I am your friend, lets make sure you feel secure, and now that you're happy, I might hop on and have a ride".

Forward III

Still struggling with "forward"? You're not alone. Here is why.

Logical thinking is a "left brain" activity. "Forward" is a "right brain" activity. If you do some research about left brain versus right brain you will realise that us humans are rewarded for using the left brain. We are rewarded for using logical thinking. We are rewarded for taking a slow and steady approach in life. We are rewarded for "building things", step by step. We are rewarded for being rational and analytical. The more we have evolved, the more we are rewarded for being "left brained".

Before children start school, they don't have that much of a preference for the left brain. But the majority of what they are taught at school, rewards left brain activity.

A lot of various arguments could stem from here, so back to the point. "Forward" is a "right brain" activity. "Forward" also seems to be very important to being a good horse rider. So if you're going to progress in your riding, you need to learn to use your "right brain" more. It's just like writing with your non-writing hand - you can do it, and it will take practice to get it smooth.

Forward II

Trying to explain the concept of "forward" is quite a challenge. Recently, a friend of mine competed in horse trials, and I thought that her summary of the ride over the cross country course gave a pretty good "feel" of what "forward" is all about.

Here is her write-up of her own ride:

'In showjumping I realised I wasn’t going forward enough and that in grade 4 you can get away with it because the jumps are quite small but in grade 3 you can’t do that. You have to ride forward or it will all go wrong. So I made sure I rode forward on the cross country!!

The second jump was HUGE so I just rode at it and it was fine. Then jump number 5 was interesting - an apex next to a tree and getting to it was tricky!! The line was terrible and the ground was boggy. So took a very very long way to get there then lost my stirrup so circled to get it back and then flew over it!!

Jump number 6 was a drop, one stride to back up the other side and then one stride to a log. I rode it terribly and way too slow and we fell through it but got there.

After that I had a good chat to myself and the next jump was quite big but I had jumped it before so I just rode at it and it was awesome and I decided I just had to let her go and trust her to jump them.

So I did jump 1-8 in 4 mins and 8-15 in 2.5 mins!!!!!! It was the most amazing feeling going at the jumps with that much speed and then flying over them!!'

The interesting thing to note here is the amount of detail she provides about the first few jumps. That's logical planning. Then, all she says about the last few jumps is that she trusted the horse and flew over them. That ... is "forward". Get it?

Forward I

When it comes to horse riding, I seem to have a problem with "forward". That is, I am not "forward" enough. Coaches see it when my horse does a little pigroot. "You need more forward!", they scream at me. Great! Fantastic advice. Except that it usually ends there.

But what, exactly, is forward? How do I achieve forward? I mean, after all, I am a forward thinking kind of person. "Let's do this jump, then let's do the next jump". That's forward, isn't it? "Let's do this competition, then one in two weeks, then one in two weeks after that". That's forward, right?

Hmm ...

Let me backtrack a bit. Most coaches actually scream "your horse is not forward enough". Well that's plain old up the wrong alley. A horse's job is to "survive"; that means eat, seek shelter, run away from predators if required, and breed. All the horses I have ever met have plenty of "forward" when it comes to their survival.

When it comes to being ridden, the forwardness of a horse is simply a product of their rider. So it is actually me that's not "forward" enough. The problem with us humans, is that we've become too logical. And we think that logical planning is equivalent to "forward".

I seem to think that "let's do this jump, then let's do the next jump" is "forward". Well it's not. Logical planning it may be, but it's not "forward".